I had a MAJOR breakdown last night. You know the kind, right? When you cry so much your throat hurts. And your eyes feel like they are on fire and you can barely keep them open. Much of the breakdown had to do with coveting. Yep. SIN. Oh, friends, sometimes the adventure is just too much, eh?
Can you relate?
I was engaging in the dangerous activity of sinful comparison. I envied how clean this person's house was, how perfectly they decorated everything, how delicious the meal they prepared was, how easy life looked for them. I was seeing how great my failures were as I couldn't measure up in the least.
While the sin at war within my heart would love for you to say, "Aw. Poor, poor Kia!" what you need to say is, "Get a grip, lady! You are too self-focused!" Yes, I needed to get my eyes off of me and on HIM!
My breakdown was really about me not getting what I want. It was about me believing the crazy lie that I actually deserve anything but the wrath of God. I was communicating to God that He wasn't enough.
But, truly HE is more than ENOUGH. He's all that I need.
So, I am (again) fighting the coveting trap which seems to stem from a heart of not truly being thankful to God for taking care of my greatest need through the gift of salvation.
But the struggle does continue. Yes, war is on... still.
Wanna know what I want right now? You're not gonna believe this.
But I want some of these:
Is that not the cutest diaper? And ten times better than them looking good is they are supposed to be ONE SIZE fits all. Oh- diapers to put on both Sweet P and Baby A and not confuse anyone else changing my kiddos diapers?
Guess what? Lindsay over at Passionate Homemaking did a review of these diapers and is now sponsoring a giveaway for these adorable, ALL COTTON (which is important to me), one-size diapers from a company that has a mission I'd like to support.
So, while I am saying NO to coveting, I sure am heading over to Passionate Homemaking and trying to get myself a cool, free Envibum diaper! Wanna join me? Oh- and I'll do my best, with th help of the Holy Spirit, of course, to not covet if you win and not me!